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House Checklist - Scott Adams' Blog

House Checklist

If you have stairs in your home, you probably do what I do, namely leave little piles of crap at the bottom of the stairs that needs to go upstairs on your next trip. I hate those little piles. But I hate making trips upstairs for trivial reasons too.

In the house that we’re building now we’ll have little cubby holes in the walls near the top and bottom of the stairs – call them niches if you must, to hold the crap that needs to travel on the next trip. It won’t look attractive, but it will get our stuff off the floor and tucked out of the way, and that’s a start. This is more important than it seems because our dog thinks anything left on the floor for more than five seconds is a legitimate chew toy.

My other de-cluttering idea is what I call the Toy Jail. It’s a closet beneath the stairs where I plan to toss anything found downstairs that doesn’t belong there. In any given day the family drags in many pounds of miscellaneous stuff that is, for one reason or another, too valuable to discard, and too worthless to have its own space in the house. Generally your home has no established storage area for miscellaneous, odd-shaped, crapinalia. In our new home, that sort of thing will find a final resting place in the Toy Jail, along with any toy that should have been put away and wasn’t. When the Toy Jail gets full, we’ll probably have to move.

I am often amused at the features that big developers leave out of their homes. Our current home is a townhouse designed by one of the biggest names in the industry. When I want to sweep up some crumbs in the kitchen, I have to walk down two flights of stairs to the garage to get the broom. There is literally no place nearer to the kitchen to store it. I have to think the builder knew there was no broom closet in the design of the townhouse, but they also knew you wouldn’t notice it was missing until after you moved in. It’s diabolical. Our new house will have a broom closet in the kitchen.

All of this gets me to my point: Where’s my frickin’ checklist?

When you buy, rent, or build a new home, wouldn’t it be good to have a checklist of features that a house could possibly have, so you could compare it to what you will actually get? And when you build a home, wouldn’t you want to know about all the potential features that are relatively inexpensive if you think of them during the design stage?

Where’s my checklist?