Best Bacteria Ever

June 16, 2008

Did you hear about the genetically altered bacteria that can eat garbage and poop oil?

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/environment/article4133668.ece

There are a lot of potential scalable sources for renewable energy, but nothing got me more excited than these bacteria. I think it is the cartoonist in me that wants all the problems of the world to be solved by critters that eat garbage and poop oil.

I fantasize that someday the United States will hold a national lottery to see who gets to tell the president of Venezuela that we no longer need his oil. I think I would approach that conversation this way:

Me: “You know that oil you sell us?”

Chavez: “Si. What about it, Yankee devil?”

Me: “It’s the life blood of your economy, isn’t it?”

Chavez: “Si. What is your point, demon crud?”

Me: “Oil is the most valuable thing in your entire country, isn’t it?”

Chavez: “Si. Where is this conversation going?”

Me: “We invented bugs that eat garbage and poop oil.”

Chavez: “It will never work!”

Me: “You better hope so because I put some in your drink.”

So I figure these bacteria will create all the oil we need for automobiles and jets, while the new mirror-based solar energy plants going up in the deserts will handle all of our future household and industrial energy needs. Maybe you toss in a few nuclear sites, and problem solved. Someday we’ll look back and realize that oil at $140 was the best thing that ever happened.